Me, Myself and I

I hate when relationships end and the ties are jagged. I like happy endings, I also live in a bubble and can be niave at times. So while my feelings are being trampled like trash on the fairgrounds floor and my sense of what is good and right and me is tossed out the window like fastfood garbage.. I am attempting to remember who i am and what i am all about. For once, I did not allow myself to be lost in the world of another man. I was me.. For 7 months. Great. The God number shows it's face again. 7 months and i get treated with the silent treatment and bullshit. I despise both. But not the god number. One relationship ends another begins. I like to think that god removes the trash out of your life to make room for what is real and good and necessary. Like really. Do i need a man in my life who lies to me? who doesn't have it together yet, who is intelligent and acts righteous, but doesn't shouldn't really be focusing on me in the first place.. The dynamics are all screwed and it breaks down to you can't really cater to anyone else until you have learned to cater to yourself. I am notorious for not only being a daydreamer but for putting others before me.. And i really have no regrets.. i was happy in my bubble. But it is now time for reality.. and reality tells me that.. this is not the time for bubbles.

So i get tossed to the side, my feelings get trampled, the truth is revealed.. I need to learn to move on quicker and then.. I get a new job... WONDERfUL!
God knows what she is doing... I've been out of work since March 26... 10 weeks and then i get a new job and not only 1 but 2.. a FT and a PT.. nepotism works in job number 2.. or god is tired of me being lazy and not doing shit. or finally ready for me to move on to the next thing..

I miss having ample dollars at my disposal.. and how nice of her to ease out of my life the one person i would spend my disposable and non disposable money on right at the time that i have more money then i have had since i met person.

great.. she really knows what she is doing
and i am ready for the next thing..
my confidence is building while my heart is mending
my voice is stronger, my writing is directed
im ready.. for the new thing.. im just glad.. i don't have to be sorry and broke anymore.. ;) it makes moving on so much easier..

and as for me myself and i
we need a theme song that is not beyonce..
i guess it's time to write it myself..