So many words runnin thru my head

So many words running through my head

So many words running through my head. In the past few days I’ve been mute. And I have heard in response to my muteness that for a writer,  for a wanna be songwriter for a poet as prolific as I am.. I have NOTHING to say..and I can’t explain it.

In the past few days I have learned a few things about myself.

1. I think in concepts and pictures not words. As a result these motion pictures are often hard to translate in tense personal situations. They aren’t really words but emotions and pictures.


2. Love stinks. And for this present moment I don’t want to be a part of it. (ok maybe I lie)


3. I am dramatic if only in my mind


4. I create drama to have something to write about


5. I don’t know if it’s better to marry for love or security


6. I run from trouble or tense situations and being mute is my new way of being in the room but running away to that crazy place in my head

These are a just a few concepts.. I have decided to start keeping a journal again.I forgot why I started to write.. Not for other people but to keep me sane. Keeping words inside my head. Only pollutes my environment further.. I wish I could go walking this AM but it’s SNOWING…

Have I ever said how much I hate snow. I don’t like it.. Like right now from this vantage point. Inside, looking outside my window. I realize.. snow is pretty.. but being in that shit.. SUCKS it’s ugly once it touches dirt and dogs piss on it. And people in Richmond can’t drive in the rain. SNOW STOPS THE FRIGGIN CITY!!!!  

So that’s my rant for the day. I broke a mans’ heart. I’ve confused the status quo. I have included others into my mental confusion. I got a new Treo.  I need to start writing again. If not for my sanity, well then for my pocket. At least I can be slightly crazy and paid for that shit.

Peace. Hopefully
J

Oh.. I am really going to make these baskets for Christmas.. think.. www.oyinhandmade.com or www.carolsdaughter.com ..  I’m thinkining shea butter body wash, lotion, body butter, body scrub, bath salts, body sprays, bar soap etc..  (you should see my bathroom closet HAH) I am thinking of calling my line.. Beautifully You or beautifully and wonderfully made…. (  drop a note if you like either one.. or if you want something under your Christmas tree or if you want a fragrance other than spiced pear, frank and myrhh, vanilla lace or something of that sort.. I’m still ordering.. I gots time. And hey it’s an extended holiday season.. I can give Zawadi for Kwanza (